Nanay, I Hope You Can Read This From Heaven

The last year of your life, we never really celebrated Mother’s Day with a bang and it seems that you were happy with just a mere greeting. I regretted not ever giving you the best and most unforgettable Mother’s Day last year. I don’t think treating you to watch Happy Feet 2 two days before you died was good enough to make you happy. There were lots of things that I want to do and I want you to witness before you go away. I want you to bring you to places where you’ve never been to. I want to treat you to lunch to Afhats every weekend. I want to buy you new clothes to wear instead of those horrid antique clothes that you hold on to from the yester years and I want you to see Nica’s 18^th birthday. I want to make you happy and make you forget your problems at least for one day in your life. As much as I want to make it up to you now, all of my efforts are wasted. I guess I was so busy that I have overlooked the signs that God has given us of your eventual passing. If I could have paid much more attention, I would have stopped with whatever I was doing and just spent my time with you.

There were times when we find an opportunity to quarrel over some trivial things and sometimes I wondered what happened along the way. I was your bunso. From the moment you gave birth to me and from your last breath, we never really parted. I always sleep beside you. But then I grew up and I got interested with a lot of things. Moreover, I had a lot of things in my mind- work, work and more work. You must have thought that you no longer were the center of my life. Back then when I was small, I was like a puppy always following you around. Wherever you went, I always tagged along too and I cannot even go to kindergarten without you sitting beside me for a few days.  And now that I have a lot of things in mind and I have grown to be a different person than when I was young,  I wanted to tell you until the last days of your life that you were never second best. Until now, you remain my hero, my idol and my inspiration. Thank you for being the most humble, the most understanding and the best Nanay in the world. Happy Mother’s Day and we love you so much! Although you may not be able to hear me say this, but, Nanay, I hope you can read this from heaven.